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I have graduated from university this september, getting a bachelors in Theatre Studies. Ever since the summer my parents have been nagging me to get a job. I agree with them that i should get one, and have been applying like a madman..

However, in The Netherlands, Theatre (and media) is a very small field. Logically, when a newby like me applies for a job, i tend to get a 'no', because of lack of experience. I understand this, and i have been visualising a lot, and lovely job openings have been appearing all over the place. I just don't seem to get them.

However, the real problem is my parents. Everytime one of them asks me about my job applications it turns out in a fight. Just tonight my dad told me he would kick me out if things keep going like this, or that he would make me pay 400 euros a month as rent per january. Apart from that i don't have that money, i just keep getting so depressed everytime we fight about this, i feel like i'm pushing it all further and further away. I get nervous everytime i'm in the same room as my parents, because i don't know what to say about job applications if they ask, and i'm afraid that they will start shouting again and i will start crying again. What should i do? I feel powerless when i'm in the same room as them, because i just don't know what or how to change something so that it won't come up again...

Any ideas?

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Move. In all honesty, I think your folks are just concerned you'll get too cozy and you won't have to face your own issues and make your way in the world if you are constantly under their roof.

You might not be able to go into theatre as a paid job right away -do as much as you can in theatre and volunteer as necessary to get the references or experience that you need to get a paid job. in the interim you might need to get another kind of job to pay the bills... but if you are focused on your goal to get a paid job in theatre, you will.
Yes, obviously i have thought of this myself. I would move as soon as i could. But houses/appartments are extremely expensive or they have a 5 year waiting list if they are affordable.

It's so strange. I have been working parttime since i was fifteen, and never been unemployed for more than a month. Yet now they respond to me so strangely. I just don't get it.

I would love to get my own place. I'm at the right age for it and i feel like it's the right time. However, without money to afford a place, you can't get very far. Thanks for the advice though.
You will always be confronted by this if this is the way your parents think and you are in their home......Don't let anyone sway you from your dreams.....EVER!

As far as meeting the obligation set forth by your father, maybe you could just find something part time so that they know you are trying to meet their demands while still pursuing your dreams.....Don't cry and don't bring yourself any of their negative energy.....I know it must be difficult being under their roof, but by the same token, you have grown quite a bit and YOU'VE GRADUATED, AND SHOULD BE CONGRATULATED! CONGRATULATIONS!

They will always be your parents and while under their roof, they will always have rules, however, YOU ARE AN ADULT AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO PLAY INTO THEIR ARGUMENTS AND YOU ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE TO WALK AWAY.....What is difficult is meeting up to their requirements while trying to move forward with your own life, and there must be a compromise....You need not mention your effort in trying to get work. As long as you behave like their child, you will be treated like their child.....Simply take control and give them the information you want to give them and if that means paying rent, then, try and find something that will at least do this for now.....Other than that, your future is your business and you get respect by the maturity you show when you respond, so take that into consideration.....

Don't feel depressed, it is negative energy, and you know that by the power of the Universe, if you feel this way, it will continue to bring more and more of the same to you.....

You have to grow up and take control of your life and take control of your feelings and the direction you want to go in - it has always been your choice.....


I wonder how things turned out for this person?

Where'd ya dig this one out, Laura? :D But srsly, it'd be cool to her from her now! 

Hi Laura, Brandon,
I'm still here actually!
As for the job part: I got a paid job after a couple more applications, got my own place and have jobhopped a couple of times since. Mostly doing management now, but I've been writing a lot, performing and last week even got published by a national newspaper:D Hopefully I'll be able to make a living off of the artistic stuff soon.
Thanks for asking, and I hope you're all doing good?


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